I keep reading and hearing about it.
A Yankees vs. Phillies World Series is the ultimate nightmare for Mets fans. It's like choosing between cancer and AIDS. Both suck, and no matter who wins, you still lose.
Well, that's true and yet, not.
First of all, as a Mets (and Angels) fan living in Los Angeles, I can assure you that a Yankees vs. Dodgers World Series would be the ultimate nightmare for me. Thankfully that didn't happen.
Second of all, if you're a New York Mets fan, you do not root for the New York Yankees.
Never ever never ever never ever under any fucking circumstances!!!!! You do not pick and choose depending on which team the Yankees are playing. NEVER!!!!!!!
I understand Met fans who don't want to root for the Philadelphia Phillies, a team that has emerged as the new rivals in the NL East and could end up repeating as World Series champions.
But the Atlanta Braves were the Mets' main rivals for many many years, and even played the Yankees in the World Series twice. Losing to them in both 1996 and 1999. If you were a Met fan, YOU STILL ROOTED FOR THE BRAVES TO BEAT THE YANKEES BECAUSE THEY ARE THE FUCKING YANKEES!!!
This is where some people may be confused. Why do Met fans HAVE to hate the Yankees?
- Because of the obnoxious arrogance displayed by both their longtime fans and their legions of bandwagon boobs and douchebags who feel that they are absolutely entitled to always win.
- Because of the sheer absurdity of "26 rings!!! 26 rings!!!" When the reality is, they have 7 rings since 1962, the first year of the Mets' existence. 7 is still a lot more than 2, but it's not 26. The last thing we need is "27 rings!!! 27 rings!!!" or... 8 since 1962.
- Because they are a team whose latest dynasty (1996, 1998-2000) was built upon performance enhancing-drugs, and the Mets LOST to that roided-up team in the 2000 World Series.
- Because Alex Rodriguez is another steroid-using lying cheating prick who is in love with both Kate Hudson and Derek Jeter's ass.
- Because of the lunacy of the "aura and mystique" horseshit.
- Because of the fucking Steinbrenners.
- Because in New York City, the media will always treat the Yankees as numero uno because they've been around since 1903, and as a result, have a longer history. Why should any Met fan be happy about that?
- Because while I don't believe that the Yankees "buy championships" as no team can do so, they definitely do attempt to buy postseason berths. What makes that unfortunate is that many Met fans believe their team has to follow suit and continually lead the NL in highest payroll, instead of constructing the best team period.
- Because Roger Clemens intentionally beaned Mike Piazza, and later threw a bat at him, you fucking forgetful fruits!
- Because the Yankees and their fans represent all that is wrong with baseball, and they are known as the "Evil Empire" for many reasons, some of which I've already mentioned.
If you are a true Met fan, you already know most of these things. You know that while another Phillies World Series championship is not exactly preferable, it's certainly and unquestionably the lesser of two evils.
Still can't root for the Phillies? Ok fine...
Root for meteors to hit both ballparks. Root for terrorism. Root for the swine flu to infect both clubs and make the games impossible to play. Root for Pilot Sully Sullenberger to make an emergency landing on Derek Jeter instead of the Kate Hudson river.
Only phony baloney bullshit fair-weathered faggot Met fans who have no real understanding or concept of Met fandom root for the Yankees.